Holding Space

With Shelly Vaughn

I wonder if he knows…

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I wonder if he knows…

How much I love just being by his side.
That he’s my best friend.
How much I love feeling his hands holding mine.
How bad I feel that I made him a caregiver, but how impressed I am at how well he does the job.
How I appreciate all the adventures we do together.
That I wish our life wasn’t in this place, but there’s no one I’d rather have helping me get through it.
How well he predicts what I need- sometimes even before I know it myself.
That a vow 14 years ago was so much more than words- and I’ve witnessed him living it out in amazing ways.
How I’ve smiled in my half-sleep state, too tired to get up or say anything, as I’ve heard him make our kids laugh.
That I trust now more than ever, that he would be an amazing father if he had to do it alone.
That I couldn’t be winning this fight without him.
That he stole my heart when I when just 15 yrs old… and he still has it today.

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